BDSM

BDSM is an acronym of various sexual practices and can be broken into three subcategories:

BD – Bondage and Discipline

DS – Dominance and Submission

SM- Sadism and Masochism

Just be honest with yourself. You don’t have to be ashamed if you are one of the BDSM players. It’s just about choice and preference of sex life.

In fact, according to a recent report on the prevalence of BDSM, it shows BDSM is pretty common, especially after the film series of Fifty Shades come out. The lifestyle of BDSM has been pushed a lot into the mainstream.

It’s a pre-agreed word which one partner can say if the BDSM play goes in too far. For instance, “Yellow” is commonly used to represent “I’m reaching my limit”, “Red” means “Stop at once” while “Green” stands for “Everything is perfect and keep going”. You can choose any word you like as safe words provided it’s short easy to remember. Negotiate with your partner in advance in case of confusion and misunderstanding.

Both soft limits and hard limits are important no matter you are with a long-time partner or a person you do not know very well. They decide what’s acceptable and unacceptable during your play. Soft limits are negotiable activities, while hard limits are activities that you or your partner absolutely will not tolerate. Soft and hard limits are different for everyone. Pre-play negotiations will help you to come up with your limits and make your practice as fun and smooth as possible.

The Dom / Dominance is a person who has been given consent to have power over another individual in BDSM practice.

The Sub / Submissive is a person who gives up power of his/her actions, behavior and body, is receiving the end of the humiliation and pain from the Dom.

Exert Your Imagination

Let your fantasies run wild figuring out your wants and needs.

Communicate With Your Lover

Before you start, arrange a date to discuss deeply changing your vanilla sex. Many open and detailed questions are required to explore the deeper sexual desires of you two. Also, your limits and safe words should be determined at this stage.

Learn Through Practice

Taking baby steps is highly recommended. One new trial with a little progress each time is enough. After the erotic intimacy, spend some time to do a review and think about how to make it even better.

Keep An Open Mind

If you are new to BDSM, doing some research is necessary. Also, keep your options open. Give everything a try as long as it is within your limits.

Read our blog for more details – Are You Boring About Vanilla Sex

Here are four suggestions may be what you need.

  • Open Communication
  • Knowledge Learning
  • Setting up rules
  • Step-by-step Practice

For more details, read our ultimate guide – How to Introduce Bondage / BDSM to Your Relationship

How To Be An Excellent Dom

Good Doms have the aura of authority and both body language and speeches are powerful. They give clear orders to their subs instead of asking what Subs want to do. The Subs’ safety, proper training, the satisfaction of sexually as well as emotionally and physically are all within their duty. Besides, all the activities should base on mutual consent in case of abuse and humiliation. There are many different roles for Doms to play such as Dad, boss, and King.

How To Be An Excellent Sub

Good Subs will conduct themselves in a modest manner and show worship to their Doms at all times. During the play, you could dress up in the Dom’s favorite sexy costumes to please them. Besides, positively thinking about what your Doms needs and fulfilling them will bring more satisfaction. There are many different roles for Subs to play such as secretary, pet and slave.

Want to know more? Read our blog – Help Your Dominant-Submissive Relationship Work Well

We have summarized the top 5 essential BDSM toys for beginners’ treasure chest.

Leather Blindfolds

Your lover will lose in a world of sensory deprivation once slipping the erogenous blindfold over. When your lover is blissfully in-the-dark, their skin will become ultra-sensitive to subsequent stroke and kisses. Also, they won’t know where the next hit comes from. The unknown increases sensitivity and erotic excitement. It’s perfect for a range of erotic scenarios and ideal for teaming with other toys.

Bondage Collar

The collar is essential for your bondage toy collection. It helps to maintain bondage discipline and declare who’s in charge. Made of high-level leather ensures that you control your “pet” with ease. It is perfect for multiple scenes like fetish parties, role-play scenarios and so on.

Crocodile Nipple Clamps

Live out your wildest imagination with these gorgeous chained nipple clamps. These crocodile clips are great for intense nipple play. The nipple clamps are covered with durable soft rubber, providing a more comfortable fit for beginners. The intensity of the tension is adjustable with the screw located near the tips of the clamps. Made of steel, the heavy chain will increase the thrills.

Ball Gag with Nipple Clamps

For gagging explorers, this easy-to-wear ball gag takes your BDSM pleasure to the next level. When wearing a ball gag, it muffles sub’s voice and allows the wearer fully surrendering to the games. The deprivation of speech intensifies the sub’s feeling of helplessness as well as Dom’s feeling of control. Featuring 2 metal chains with nipple clamps enriches its functions. Just pull down the chains and every move brings additional stimulation.

Wartenberg Pinwheel

One of the popular sensory toys for daring people looking to spice up your sex life and willing to try out new things. Rolling the spiky wheel over your lover’s skin effortlessly treats them to complicated feelings of prickle, tickles and numb and weak.

Fifty Shades of Grey highlighting the lifestyle of BDSM has pushed it a lot into the mainstream and inspired many people’s curiosities. You’re longing to jazz up your sex life. Nonetheless, the movie doesn’t show authentic BDSM activities completely. Many advanced players have declared that the way it portrays BDSM isn’t accurate and even misleading for beginners. There are 3 things need to clarify.

  • Consensual is essential
  • Distinguish between fantasy and reality
  • BDSM isn’t a disease

For more details, read our blog – 3 Things You Must Know Before Recreating Fifty Shades of Grey In Bedroom

Bondage

BDSM is an acronym of various sexual practices and can be broken into three subcategories:

BD – Bondage and Discipline

DS – Dominance and Submission

SM- Sadism and Masochism

It’s a pre-agreed word which one partner can say if the BDSM play goes in too far. For instance, “Yellow” is commonly used to represent “I’m reaching my limit”, “Red” means “Stop at once” while “Green” stands for “Everything is perfect and keep going”. You can choose any word you like as safe words provided it’s short easy to remember. Negotiate with your partner in advance in case of confusion and misunderstanding.

Both soft limits and hard limits are important no matter you are with a long-time partner or a person you do not know very well. They decide what’s acceptable and unacceptable during your play. Soft limits are negotiable activities, while hard limits are activities that you or your partner absolutely will not tolerate. Soft and hard limits are different for everyone. Pre-play negotiations will help you to come up with your limits and make your practice as fun and smooth as possible.

The Bondage refers to the act of restraint, restraint can be anything from simply restricting somebody’s movement, for example tying somebody to a bed or handcuffing their wrists together. But it also includes other sorts of restrictions, like wearing a ball gag or an eye mask during the play. There are also some advanced forms of restraint, such as bondage cages or ceiling hooks. Usually, there is a sexual aspect of bondage.

Bondage is a core part of BDSM rather than being two separate concepts. It may be used in conjunction with other sexual activities. Besides bondage, BDSM includes many other flavors of activities, such as Dominance and Submission, and role-play. Also, you can explore flagellation, spanking, medical submission and so on. Our Guide – 5 Common BDSM Activities will tell you in detail.

Furthermore, bondage is fairly pure and based around sex. It doesn’t necessarily imply sadomasochism. There are a couple of different types of bondage, like bondage for a purpose, decorative bondage. Some people find the act of being bound enjoyable in and of itself while others find the aesthetics alone of bondage pleasurable. However, BDSM is much more complex and a little bit hardcore. It’s more about control and discipline. People revel in BDSM for mental satisfaction. Dom expects to be pleased and demand obedience while Sub has the desire to please the Dom and always put the needs of their partners above everything else. In some cases it may not involve sex at all, for example, a Dom wants more control from the Sub so a chastity belt is used.

Sensory play is one kind of BDSM play which makes use of your partner’s senses to heighten arousal. When it comes to Bondage, it’s often done to the restrained player.

Yes! But as with any other BDSM kinks, there are safety considerations before you dive in.

  • Discuss boundaries and decide on a safe word/action beforehand.
  • All discomfortin playtime should be the kind you want.
  • Check for loss of circulation
  • Stop immediately if the bottom experiences pain or signs of circulatory problems.
  • Neverleave a restrained bottom unattended.

Read more about bondage safety, and 3 Positions of Arm and Leg Restraints

First of all, breaking the routine. Over time, even the most vibrant sex will become boring. More and more couples choose bondage to break the routine, using bondage toys to spice things up.

Second, escaping from reality. Lots of people enjoy the complete disconnect with reality and escape from the stresses of life, responsibility or guilt. It feels like a new, exciting, totally different world with rules and norms. Many people move to an almost trance-like state and forget their real-world responsibility and guilt.

Third, many people crave power more than money. The power can be particularly attractive to those who may not be in the position of power in real life, bondage allows them to be in total control.

Forth, security. You may wonder why people have the desire to be dominated, some psychologists have said that the reason can be traced back to childhood when children are rewarded for being good. It’s common for those who enjoy being subs to please another person even to hurt themselves.

People revel in spanking for different reasons. Some like the punishment, role-playing thing, others just enjoy the pain part of it. Anyway, spanking will leave a naughty mark. The marks not only act as a constant reminder of your fun, but they also make an incredibly sexy decoration releasing the electricity and surprise, the twinning of pain and pleasure. Also, it satisfies the lust for power as well as the desire to submit oneself.

On a purely physical level, there are several things make spanking so appealing. With a good smack on the bottom, increased blood flow to the ‘sweet spot’ makes it more susceptible to the coming tantalizing touch. Further excite your lover’s eager senses with fingers, kisses or tickles to encourage an explosive physical reaction. Besides, spanking will stimulate the nerves, increasing blood flow to the bum and genitals. The genitals will become further enlarged, thus increasing sexual arousal and intensifying the whole experience.

Consensus and mutual trust are the precondition of spanking play. The game allows you to experience a level of trust that you never thought possible, as boundaries are pushed but never overstepped, and connect with your partner on an entirely new emotional level. It strengthens your relationship and pushes further intimacy.

Rope bondage is art with professional skills and creativity. It’s made up of many different ties. Here are 3 easy ties for you to get started.

  • Square Knot – Suitable knot if you want to tie up loose ends. It applies less pressure to the skin so it’s for light duty only.
  • Bowline Knot – It’s perfect for binding the wrists and ankles. It won’t tighten, so you needn’t worry about circulatory problems.
  • Twist Knot – Another beautiful knot to bind wrists and ankles.

Learn how to tie these knots in detail.

Bondage Collar

The collar is essential for your bondage toy collection. It helps to maintain bondage discipline and declare who’s in charge. Made of high-level leather ensures that you control your “pet” with ease. It is perfect for multiple scenes like fetish parties, role-plays scenarios and so on.

Crocodile Nipple Clamps

Live out your wildest imagination with these gorgeous chained nipple clamps. These crocodile clips are great for intense nipple play. The nipple clamps are covered with durable soft rubber, providing a more comfortable fit for beginners. Made of steel, the heavy chain will increase the thrills.

Ball Gag with Nipple Clamps

For gagging explorers, this easy-to-wear ball gag takes your BDSM pleasure to the next level. When wearing a ball gag, it muffles the sub’s voice and allows the wearer fully surrendering to the games. The deprivation of speech intensifies the sub’s feeling of helplessness as well as Dom’s feeling of control. Featuring 2 metal chains with nipple clamps enriches its functions. Just pull down the chains and every move brings additional stimulation.

Wartenberg Pinwheel

One of the popular sensory toys for daring people looking to spice up your sex life and willing to try out new things. Rolling the spiky wheel over your lover’s skin effortlessly treats them to complicated feelings of prickle, tickles and numb and weak.

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