BDSM Research

Help Your Dominant-Submissive Relationship Work Well

Dominant-submissive games seem very appealing. Many people engage in this type of relationship without any experience before. Unfortunately, many of them are fake Doms or Subs because they have no idea about what the roles entail. How can you avoid being one of them? Here are some suggestions for you to help your dominant-submissive relationship work well.

How To Be An Excellent Dom

Doms expect to be pleased, demand obedience and prioritize their desires and choices. Good Doms have the aura of authority and both body language and speeches are powerful. They give clear orders to their subs instead of asking what Subs want to do. However, great power comes great responsibility. Many Doms fail to take their responsibilities. The Subs’ safety, proper training, the satisfaction of sexually as well as emotionally and physically are all within their duty. Besides, all the activities should base on mutual consent in case of abuse and humiliation. There are many different roles for Doms to play such as Dad, boss, and King.

How To Be An Excellent Sub

Subs like to give up control of their bodies and actions and have the desire to please their Doms. Notice that not everyone is qualified for the Dom role. Give your submission carefully. Good Subs will conduct themselves in a modest manner and show worship to their Doms at all times. During the play, you could dress up in the Dom’s favorite sexy costumes to please them. Besides, positively thinking about what your Doms needs and fulfilling them will bring more satisfaction. There are many different roles for Subs to play such as secretary, pet and slave.

5 Essential Rules

If both of you and your lover are ready to build a dominant-submissive relationship, there are some rules need to be established in advance. All the details of the rules should be decided by mutual consent in order to satisfy both sides’ demands.

Honest Communication

Honest communication is essential for a successful relationship. Share your limits honestly, discuss the scope of your activities and specific about what you want. Also, you have to gather enough information to see if both of you are compatible with this type of relationship. The more effective information you get, the better you will accomplish your roles.

Realistic Expectations

The dominant-submissive relationship is always exaggerated in the movies or novels so you can’t put all of them into practice. You are different people with different willingness. Have realistic expectations so that you will have more happiness.

Safe Words

It’s easy to go in too far in these plays and can’t stop when something unpleasant occurs. At this time, safe words are available for immediate use. For instance, “Yellow” is commonly used to represent “I’m reaching my limit”, “Red” means “Stop at once” while “Green” stands for “Everything is perfect and keep going”. You can choose any word you like as safe words provided it’s short easy to remember. Negotiate with your partner in advance in case of confusion and misunderstanding.

Sufficient Patience

Rome wasn’t built in a day, and all of your demands can’t be satisfied at a time. Take baby steps toward a better understanding of each other and take time to build mutual trust. Your fantasies will come true with sufficient patience.

Good Health

A successful dominant-submissive relationship requires both of you to be psychologically and physically healthy. If one of you is not in good condition, stop the practice. Forcing to bear it brings bad experience.

What challenges have you faced with being in a dominant-submissive relationship? Let me know in the comments.